Disclaimer: Don't own em, nothing to do with me.
Summary: Sequel to "Understanding."
Contemplation
By Spirit
She didn't know what time it was, or how long she'd been there, but as Max sat on top of the abandoned office building, (the tallest in TC) she felt........ relaxed. Yes she had guilt over the way things had gone with Logan earlier, she would always care for him, but somewhere along the line, she had stopped seeing him as the love of her life and seen him more as a good friend. The fact was, without Logan around, she felt relieved, happy even.
The sound of approaching footstep's finally broke Max out of her musings.
"How did you find me?" she asked quietly, knowing exactly who it was and not seeing the need to turn and greet him.
"I just looked for the tallest building" he said, slowly sitting down beside her. "Whats up Maxie?" he asked trying to provoke a response.
"I finished with Logan" she said bluntly.
Alec just looked at her shocked. She turned to him and let out a small laugh at his _expression. He realised what she was laughing at and quickly engaged his soldier face, masking his emotions. She smiled at him then continued.
"Its OK. I mean as much as I care for Logan, this virus isn't going anywhere. Besides, I realised a few things earlier. Since I came back from Manticore, I've changed. I don't see Logan as the same person anymore. It just took me a while to realise it."
"What do you mean you've changed?" Alec asked. He already partly knew the answer. OC had told him how the old, fun loving Max used to be before she was re-captured. But he truly was interested in what she was about to say, so he listened carefully as he watched her trying to organise her thought.
Max paused gathering her thoughts so that she could explain herself properly in a way that she knew Alec would understand. .
"When I escaped, I tried so hard to fit in, to just be normal. For a while I had almost managed it, I had friends, a home, place to hang out where I was welcome and a decent job." She let out a quick laugh "well a job anyway. But there was always something missing. My family" She let out a sigh as memories of what had happened to her 'family' washed over her.
Alec could see the pained look on her. It hurt him to see her like that. He knew what had happened to most of her family, and he knew how much she missed them, how much she blamed herself. He reached out his hand and gave her shoulder a small squeeze showing his support, and that he was there if she needed him.
She felt reassured by Alec's gesture, and continued. "I had always tried to deny what I am, hide from it, keep people at a distance so that there was no chance of them finding out. If everyone thought I was normal, it made it easier for me to try and convince myself as well. Not anymore. I'm transgenic through and through, always will be. Its who I am. The good and the bad. Something that I can never escape, and for once I dint want to. And that is something Logan will never understand or accept." Max smiled as she realised something. "As weird as this sounds, for the first time in ages I feel......... free."
Max's eyes were shining so bright with this last statement, that Alec was practically mesmerised. The only word to escape his mouth was "Wow!"
She laughed lightly as she stood, holding out her hand to help him up. "Yeah, yeah I know. C'mon lets go."
He grabbed her hand, missing the mischievous glint in her eye as she pulled him up with more force than was necessary, catching him unaware, causing him to stumble forward to regain his balance.
She flashed him a quick grin before skipping off through the door, shouting over her shoulder "You coming or what?"
Alec just smiled as he jogged after her. This was a whole other side to Max that he had never seen before. But he loved it, she was happy, and so much more fun.
Please e-mail the author of this story with your comments. townie666@yahoo.co.uk